Gaydar: A colloquialism referring to the intuitive ability of a person to assess others’ sexual orientation as gay, bisexual or heterosexual.
I don’t know about you, but I can’t do any of that. I am somewhat of a people watcher. I sit in the mall all the time just looking at people walk by. I can tell when someone has a medical issue or disability, needs to pee, needs to fart, hell, even when someone is horny. The one thing I need the most to make it in this world is the one thing I don’t have.
I don’t know how many times I have wasted my time at a club, gym or school cruising a guy only for him to end up straight. How in the hell am I to know your straight if you’re in a gay club with a 40 dollar haircut and smell like Bed Bath and Beyond. I love the fact that straight guys feel comfortable to come to a gay club, but can someone put a damn button on them saying “I’m straight.”
The gym is just confusing for me. I try to put out all the gay matting calls when there. I try the look, you know what I mean: I want to take you out to dinner look (not the; I want to fuck you look/ I am so going to kill you later look). They respond with a puzzled look on their face as to way you keep checking them out, for the guys in the gym looking to show off they get off on it, but they are not gay. I also try doing the workout and sweat technique. I work out fast and sweat hard, you have to get those muscles out there (mostly every person looks good when wet; Most). All this ever gets me is to the point of passing out on the floor (if I can make it to the locker room I just sit in a stall for a min or 10).
School on the other hand is a lot more open for young gay guys to find their way. Ok, I’m just fucking with you, this is even harder than the gym and club combined. In our ever changing life’s gay and straight lines are completely blurred in high school and college. I know you would say do stuff gay guys are in to, tried that, mostly straight. I liked this guy named J (for this part of my life no full names) who whenever we were alone we had this chemistry you could cut with a knife. I have had straight guys who are very touchy feely and even flirt with you from time to time, but yet again they are not going home with you. End the end like so many gay movies in the main stream. The gay boy ends up alone, but he learned his lesson.
I don’t know what people with gaydar see: body language, hand movement, clothes, hair, voice or shoes. All I know is that I am a gay boy lost in the very small gay forest. I envy our straight counter parts in one way; they can walk down the street without a care in the world and hit on who ever walks by. For us gay in this world we have to pick and choice when to put out a matting call because ours could lead to a bashing and we don’t want that.
Editor’s note from RP Andrews: I’ve addressed the growing “blending” of the gay scene that was once a secret society a few times in my past blogs; Edmon confirms the negatives of what happens when everything is so open – maybe a little too open.
You can find more of Edmon’s perspective at his own blogsite, edmonarmstrong.blogspot.com. Or tweet him at Writing Boy@EdmonArmstrong.