The Results of My Whip It Out Poll
Last Friday l ran a poll on trends in male masturbation and discovered some surprising results among my predominantly over 40 constituents.
First, masturbation is not high on most of my guys’ “to do” lists. The majority of you said you only played with Mr. Peter once, if at all, daily and 48% said your weekly average was under 5. Good for you! While no doubt masturbation holds its pleasures, it can also be a big friggen waste of time, time that could be put to far more productive uses. Vaccuming the house, doing the laundry, working on the next great American novel …
Or Like real sex with another guy, huh?
And driving your sex selfies was porn or fantasy, either imagined or about some real episode, not virtual sex with a bro off the web or phone app, not bating with a buddy, and not using your mirror to get off. Kinda impersonal wouldn’t you say, but that’s the way the world’s going, right?
On a totally different topic, according to the U.S. Treasury Department, San Francisco which probably included Silicon Valley, topped the list of cities with the most married male couples (3.2% of its population). D.C. was #2 at 2.7%, New York came in at third at 2.4%, LA seventh at 1.1%, and my own Lauderdale, a big retirement town for gay men who made their money elsewhere, ninth at 1%.
I suspect, given the high ranking towns, money is a prime player in these matings. According to the feds, male married couples on average make $176,000, or $63,000 more than str8 married couples.
Any wonder why more and more of capitalistic America loves us?