The Fly Paper Boys
Unlike a lot of guys on the web or phone apps, who I can understand are looking to connect with another gay guy on a social, buddy-to-buddy level, I’m not into chatting, and I say that in my profile. That’s why, call me a prick, I try my best to steer clear of guys, even hot, good looking guys, who start the conversation with a “hi, sexy,” or “hi, buddy, how’s your day?,” instead of like direct little me does, “Hey man, you’re hot, wanna connect?” or “wanna connect while I’m in town?”
Instead, I have to ask myself, are these guys using their innocent greeting as a ploy for coming on to me, and if they’re not townies, are they planning a vacation here and want to connect? I’ve been hesitating to ask the second question lately because 1 out of 3 are fishing around for a free place to stay at which I wouldn’t mind considering, though they be unproduct tested, if they lived in LA or New York or Palm Springs or Atlanta or SF where there might be some reciprocation going, you know what I mean? But when they’re from Lansing, Michigan or southeast Oregon, well …
And even if a free vacation ain’t on their agenda, the conversation usually goes one of two ways, both of them wastes of time from my perspective.
Either the guy starts asking me how I spent my day (“playing with myself”) and then he replies by telling me how he spent his day (“milking the cows”), with the conservation becoming as exciting as watching glue dry. I can sense the loneliness in many a guy’s responses especially those who live in No (Gay) Mans Land.
Sorry, I’m not Dr. Phil.
Or he starts with the dirty talk because his end objective is for me to get him hot enough to spurt his load, something I’m rarely in the mood for.
Both conversations, if I carelessly continue them, really become a pain in the ass since when I’m on my pc I’m working on my writing and simultaneously checking out the hook-up sites to see if I can find somebody to, well, hook-up with, then or before I end up in the nursing home.
These guys are what I call the fly paper boys – as much as you try to extract yourself from the chat, they continue to pull you in with another question from “oh, what do you write?” to “you shoot big loads daddy?” And among the fly paper boys are a lot of repeaters who keeping coming back again and again and again …
So what have I been doing? Taking a hint from the young webbies who have no social skills whatsoever, I just cut the conversation off in midstream or don’t reply to their next probing query like how big my dick is. (It’s 6.5 cut.)
Or hope they’ve already popped their load and leave me alone.